I believe I can speak for most of the young, unmarried women reading my blog; you would love to be married someday. You’d love to find “the one” who will love you, lead you, support you, and cherish you. You’ll buy a house together, have your own traditions, start a family, run your own house, etc. Whether your dream guy is blonde or brunette, you often dream about your happily ever after. I completely understand, because I’m that girl too. Ever since I was a little girl, I dreamed of meeting Mr. Right someday. I went as far as creating a wedding binder full of ideas. Of course, I still plan my wedding on Pinterest. (dear future husband, I hope you like the colors I’ve chosen!) If you are that type of girl, listen up. All those dreams are perfectly lovely and innocent, but are you discontent with your life now? If so, don’t be. “But….” you might be thinking. “Mr. Right, where are you?” you’re probably saying. If you’re that person, don’t fret.
I’m reading the book “Joyfully At Home” by Jasmine Baucham. It’s pretty good and she has some good points. Although I may not share all her opinions and views, she still has great things to say. I especially love what she writes on single life with the hope of marriage in the future. Being single is a blessing, and we as unmarried women need to realize that. Don’t let Satan cause you to think that being single is a curse. It’s not. Here’s a few excerpts from the book “Joyfully At Home”.
We need to live in the present while planning for the future. When we stand before the Lord, we will be responsible for the way we used all of our time, not just our married years. We need to learn, right now, to find our contentment in the Lord. As daughters, as wives, as mothers, every aspect of our lives should be geared towards Him. As single daughters in the home, our long-term focus should not be on that husband of ours that may come along; it should be on the Lord’s Kingdom. All of our other longings, desires, aspirations, and actions should be filtered through His lens.
“Live in the present while planning for the future”; this is so great. It’s completely okay to plan. I must confess, I like to plan ahead. I’ve never been a huge procrastinator. But lately, I’ve been faced with not knowing where I’ll be in the next few months. So I just have to take it day by day. During your singleness, rely on God for your future and keep your eyes on Him at all times. If you keep your eyes on finding your other half, you’ll lose sight of God and what His plan if for you. Don’t let that happen. Keep your eyes on Jesus and He’ll reveal His plan for you in His timing.
Marriage is such a beautiful union, a state that many of us (I’d venture to say most of us), Lord willing, will someday occupy. I believe that marriage is something that the unmarried of us should be thinking about – we should be praying and seeking the Lord’s will in finding and preparing for a spouse, leaning on our parent’s guidance during this critical time of preparation, but, also realizing that our single years are fleeting, and that this unique time of ministry will not be around forever.”
Marriage is beautiful. That’s probably why we dream about it. The reason why it’s such a beautifully perfect union is because God designed it. He designed it between one man and one woman. And if it comforts you, most of us will enjoy this union someday. Of course, some people feel called to be single their whole life, but for the most part, God has created each of us for marriage, as it symbolizes His perfect love for the Bride of Christ – The Church. As much as we need to be content in our singleness, we also need to be thinking about marriage. Don’t ignore it completely. Ask God to begin preparing you for that calling. This goes for you young men as well. God has designed you (men) to be the spiritual leaders of the home. This is serious business. So before you’re married, immerse yourself in God’s Word and in prayer. For you ladies, this also applies. Pray, seek the Lord, read the Bible, and let God prepare you to be a wife, mother, homemaker, helper, etc. Also, probably one of the most important thing you could do as a single man or woman is pray for your future spouse. Do you do that? Wherever they are in the world right now, and whether you’ve met them already or not, pray for them. Who knows, they may not even be a Christian at this point in their life. So pray for them! Pray for their walk with God, their family, and anything else that comes to mind. I know I’ve prayed for my future spouse, whether I’ve met him yet or not. I’ve even prayed for the guys in my life, and for their hearts, minds, and ultimately their relationship with the Lord. Prayer; that’s the key.
Desire marriage in its proper context – as a vessel for God’s glory – more and more, and you will grow to realize that it is nothing to sigh over. It is a battlefield to prepare for. We are God’s children – we don’t have to wait to fight the battle. We’re fighting everyday in singleness, for joy and wholeness in whatever state the Lord has placed us.
I love this. Often, Disney princess movies will depict love at first sight (which can sometimes be true), a perfect love story, carriages, and just pure bliss. Which, although I’ve never experienced it yet, I’m sure marriage is pure bliss. But it’s not only that, it’s also a fierce battle. Simply being a Christian is a battle, but being married and living the Christian life with another Christian is a battle in and of itself. That’s why we, both men and women need to be prepared. Sure love is important in a marriage, but having a solid relationship with the Lord before marriage is even more important. Marriage comes with its many benefits and its perfectly fine to desire that type of union. But don’t ignore the responsibilities that come with being married. Marriage is not all flowers, green meadows, puffy white clouds, and cake.
However, what attracts me most is the fact that marriage is a team of two, living life together, fighting through the hardships, furthering God’s Kingdom (aka becoming parents), and loving each other through all the troubles life undoubtedly has. That’s what makes marriage beautiful.
So, pray. Seek the Lord. Wait. Wait patiently. It’s going to be worth it. God’s timing is perfect. And don’t worry. Be content. Being single is just the preparation for your future marriage, so use those single years wisely and for God’s glory!